If any one of you may be pregnant, I suggest you not watch this video by mewithoutYou because it will rock you so hard, you may miscarriage….
Tonight is the annual all night softball tournament that my dudes and I play in every year. This is our 5th year doing it, and due to the law of odd years, we should do pretty good. The event is not so much about playing softball as it is staying up all night, grilling out, playing cornhole, and having a few drinks. It is basically like tailgaiting all night, and taking an hour break to play softball every once in a while. This year our games are at 6pm, 10pm, 2am, and then sometime between 6 and 9am on Sunday. It is probably one of the coolest things I take part in on an annual basis, and win or lose, it is always a great time. So in honor of the tournament, I wanted to make some general predictions for this year based off of my past experiences. Here we go!
- The “Big Ginger” Josh H. will lead the team, and perhaps the entire tournament in beers drank, strikeouts, hot dogs eaten, and most consecutive minutes bitching about something.
- “The Gun Show” will hit 47 home runs…….in their first game!
- Somebody will forget to buy something vegetarian for Dan W to eat, and he will pass out due to starvation in the 2nd inning of our second game.
- K. Hrubey will use the phrase “shirt bling” 153 times.
- At some point in the night, it will downpour for 25 minutes, and afterwards, the director of the tournament will expect the teams to take care of the fields using only water bottles cut in half and a spork.
- I will dominate cornhole, euchre, and whatever games anyone wants to play me in.
- There will be an Amish team that everyone thinks looks funny, but then goes on to absolutely dominate every other team in not only softball, but barn raisings and quilt making.
- There will be one “softball guy” who disagrees with a call that the volunteer umpires make and will then proceed to grab a bat, hop the fence, and chase down the umpire while threatening his life…..this person will be Mr. Ruffing.
- Harrell will remember what he had for lunch on March 12, 1997……..tuna salad!!!
- Everyone will sleep for 20 straight hours tomorrow.
There it is!!! Take it to the bank, I’ll bet anyone a million dollhairs that all of those predictions come true. If I can borrow $20 from anyone, that would be great. One Love!