Day 289: Why can’t you take a turkey to church??? Because they have such…….FOWL…..language……ZING!

Ahhh, it’s that time of year again, Thanksgiving time!  Everyone is excited about the short work week, but it is just another 7 day weekend for yours truly.  I love this time of year.  The food, the football, the holiday beverages….it’s all great.  Last year I was able to make it to like 3 Thanksgiving dinners in one 24 hour period.  I don’t know if I have that kind of effort in me again this year, but it’s the thought that counts, and you have to admire the willingness to try.

"This looks great! But what is everyone else going to be eating???" - Me

I have a pretty crazy story from the weekend that I can’t stop thinking about and that I would like to share with you.  So, I went to a “night at the races” fundraising event on Saturday night.  I had never been to one, but it is basically set up like a horse track where you can bet on horses from taped races that are like from the 70’s and 80’s.  It was a lot of fun!  I won a couple of the races I had bet on, but that isn’t what my story is about.  One of the “side games” they had going on was this bead game.  Basically, a set of beads cost $5, and you could only have up to 3 sets of beads.  The game part consisted of calling heads or tails on a coin flip.  If you got the call wrong, you had to take a set of beads off.  If you got the call right, you kept your beads on, and the last person with any beads left would win $380.  So the DJ gets everyone with beads to stand up and he starts the game.  Let’s jump ahead about 2 minutes….I have just called the first 9 coin flips correctly, and have been asked to go up to the front of the room with the other 4 finalists.  My competitors all had one set of beads left, I still had all of mine remaining.  The next coin flip takes place, and only myself and one other person guess correctly.  So it is just me and him.  Well what happened next defies all odds, as I ended up losing the next 3 guesses, and losing $380 bucks!!!  I went 10-0 to start the game, had a 50/50 chance of just calling the right side of the coin, plus the additional odds of having 3 sets of beads compared to the one set my foe had.  But instead, I lost it all, and I didn’t even get a consolation prize.  I basically looked like an ass up there, and after completely turning the game of heads or tails on its side, I came away with nothing!  “What’s the most you’ve ever lost on a coin toss?”

It’s $380….no doubt about it.  $380.  It sucks too because ever since I lost my job, I have become very…resourceful I guess you could call it.  I can make $10 in gas last for over 2 weeks.  I can make a gallon of milk last for almost 3 months, but I wouldn’t recommend trying that.  I have learned how to sew so I can make all of my own clothing now.  That $380 could have easily have lasted me the rest of the year, AND I could have started my non existent child’s college fund.  But instead, I lost money, and woke up with cake icing all over my shirt and pants.  I don’t know how that happened.

Well that’s all I got for today.  Hope everyone has a good day, and just think, today is really like Wednesday in work week terms.  I leave you with a haiku…

Turkey week is here!
Jim Tressel is still a queer,
Gravy everywhere!!!

"Nice ass son." - Jim Tressel

One Love!

SELAH


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